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My DW told me last night that she wants a divorce. She just can’t do it anymore and I am too hard to live with. Needless to say, I’m devastated. 😥 I am so sorry. Know that this will get better. It will take a while to get through the pain, to unbox the years together, but you will emerge again. I know it may not feel like that today, but it is true. Hang in there! I’m sorry to hear this. There will be more low times ahead but you can survive it, I promise. Some couples find ways to work it out after one drops the “d” word, my experience wasn’t like that. Feel free to PM me if you want any advice privately. It took us about 3 years for the divorce to go thru and I’ve been 2 years clear of it since.
Life sometimes throws us stuff we can’t control or fix. You just have to pass thru it.
Hang in there and don’t try to shoulder it alone. Seek support. We are here for you.
Is it too soon to offer suggestions? I’ve been there. Survived — so far….have suggestions…problems went beyond the church, but included it. Found broad principles in quasi-secular/religious marital thought that helped immeasurably and salvaged it. Been doing OK for 15 years since, although it’s never a cakewalk….
Also, is your spouse definite about the divorce? Or is your relatinoship in the “threatening a divorce phase”. In other words, if you made some kind of transformation (as I did, in a non-church way) could this change their mind?
SD
Been there & got through it. It was 2 or 3 weeks after we were baptised.
There were times that were difficult.
You’ll get through it.
You’re not alone my friend.
Keep posting.
I am so sorry to hear that. How long have you been married? Do you have any kids? Have you seen a marriage counselor together?
Divorce and the feelings surrounding divorce always are difficult. God bless you no matter how this develops.
What horrible news for you. I am so sorry.
Know that we are all here to offer a listening ear and an Virtual box of Kleenex
Oh I am so sorry. I have no advice, but listening ears, aching heart, and confidence in your ability. Thank you for letting us in. Your in my thoughts and prayers for brighter tomorrows. Thanks for all your support. We have been married almost 25 years and have 5 children. The church and our kids have been our life. Divorce isn’t certain, but unless there are some big changes, it seems inevitable. We have had marital counseling sporadically for the past couple years. It’s ironic that my relationship with our kids has never been better, but our marriage has never been worse. Unfortunately, we’ve let our kids polarize our differences and drive us apart. I don’t want our marriage to end, and I hope we can salvage it. It’s a long road ahead and I’m not sure my DW has anything left in the tank. I don’t have much either, but I still have hope.
Thanks for the virtual box of Kleenex and a listening ear!
I read the other day that just over 50% of divorced people wish that they would have stayed married. I imagine that this is because many of the problems that caused the unhappiness do not go away by ending the marriage. I personally love the song “Broken Together” by Casting Crowns. It gives me inspiration to keep trying even when it gets hard.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RhxELo-uD3c OTOH, That 50% statistic leaves a slight minority that may find themselves in a better place after the dust settles from a divorce.
I cannot know which path would be right for you and your family but I am confident that whatever happens there will be better days and better things in your future.
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