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The organization of the LDS church claims to represent Christ. Christ is stated to be perfect.
Christ is over the church organization and individuals are under the hierarchy of the church. The church is the middleman between God and individuals.
Because Christ is above the church and perfect,the church is not going to apologize for Christ. Individual authorities decide what the Church does in Christ’s name. Things that are erroneous are obviously just an individual’s error in judgement.
This puts the church in an interesting position. The church would see no need to apologize for an individual’s poor decision. That apology is left for the individual.
This duality of speaking for diety .. yet having individuals make decisions would make it very difficult or the church to apologize.
I understand the mindset, but I think they are wrong.
Quote:Ray wrote:
God bless you – and your family that is far away right now.
Weird fact: I went from daughter to roommate to wife. Thinking about it, we realized that I had never spent more than a single night on my own. Either DH was home or kids were home. Just a few times, kids and HD were gone at the same time for a single night. Even conferences, if they were more than a night, I was sharing a hotel room with someone. In almost 32 years of marriage, SH and I have never been apart more than a week.
This next week, I will be back in town. My family will still be traveling. I will be on my own from Monday to Saturday. Yes, I work, and this next week will be especially busy (which is why I am not traveling with my family). But I’m still wrapping my head around a week on my own and almost 2 weeks without DH.
Expect lots of postings!
Locally, the stake center is used for Sunday meetings by only wards within the stake. All other buildings are fair game for mixing units from different stakes. As newlyweds, we lived someplace where we could travel 90 minutes south and still be in our ward. The stake center was an hour north in another state. Stake meetings had most people traveling over an hour to attend. Some leaders had a 2.5 hour each way drive. My visiting teaching route had me going 26 miles one direction and then 30 miles another direction to see someone else. It was a real effort to see everyone. I do not miss all that driving.
In comparison, in the SLC area, my daughter had her HTs stop by without any notice. It was late in the evening on Dec 23. She has been in the ward since May and this was their first visit. Her ward covers 3 blocks. Lazy Ass Home Teachers.
People will make whatever efforts or excuses needed in order to live the life they choose to live. A 30 minute rule isn’t going to improve attendance for many. It just changes the excuses that they use.
I am in the SLC area visiting a married daughter. We went to sacrament meeting. Ward business, the sacrament, a couple choir songs and then two 5 minutes talks by a husband and wife who both have had high ward/stake callings. The ward boundaries just moved and both talked about losing their status within their religious community. Lots of sobbing and tears. Lots of talking about JS and his bravery. No discussion about Christmas. It had been quite a while since I had attended a church meeting. This experience didn’t make me want to hurry back.
I appreciate the honesty of someone who admits to not be always inspired. The people who hear the Voice of God speaking to them all the time and feel everything they do is always inspired — those are very scary people.
I call myself Amateur Parent because I do my best — but I still make many mistakes. By claiming my Amateur status, it makes it easier to apologize to my children when I don’t get parenting done correctly. To me, the ability to apologize, talk about the problem, and move on within the parent-child relationship is healthy and extremely important. It is Christian. The Church is too often so authoritarian in their approach, that when there is a serious concern about the actions of the organization, the leaders can be over-focused on maintaining the public image of authority and power. They can cause more harm through that stance. At some point, I am hoping they learn the power of approachability, accountability, and sincere apology.
Tess of the D’Urbervilles was my first introduction to Thomas Hardy. I loved that book. Far from the Maddening Crowd became another favorite. Tonight, I realized that I had never read any of his poetry. Thank you for sharing such a perfect poem. My life is richer tonight because of it.
Hmmm… Many years ago, a psychologist friend told me to listen when people made excuses. They will list 3 or 4 of them, but the real excuse is the last one they mention. Example: “We didn’t attend because I worked late, my husband was tired, the kids were acting up, and we were short on money.” Answer: Money was their real issue.
Articles often follow that same pattern. They put in filler stories but save the real reason of the article for the last scenario — especially when it is seen as controversial.
This article starts out with typical single kid issues, moves to a more serious and real single daughter situation and .. BOOM .. Faith Crisis. It’s a great article to teach people how to react.
Usually I just frisbee alumni magazines into the trash. Thank you for sharing this Joni.
LH: Your comments. Yes, exactly that.
People want to make tithing a competition for righteousness. Tithing is many things but it isn’t supposed to be competition.
You could spend the entire time discussing “what is tithing” by simply talking about different circumstances: Military family that receives free housing, pension benefits, and health care — should they pay tithing on the value of those benefits?
Small business owner — Does she pay tithing on the business profits or only on what she takes out of the business as an income?
Two salaried employees make the same income. One gets health insurance through work for free, the other has to buy their own health insurance and pay $1200 a month for it. How would tithing amounts vary between these two people?
A couple makes two excellent incomes. They invest 50% of their gross, pay 40% of their gross for various taxes and live off 10% of their gross. They join the church and want to tithe. Do they pay tithing on the amount that they live off of, on their net after taxation, or the total amount they are actually paid?
A member lives in a socialist country and pays 65% of their income in taxation. Do they pay tithing on their gross or net?
Let people discuss.
Read the church’s official statement.
Talk about the importance of not comparing ourselves to others. Stress the importance of coming up with a prayerful tithing answer that is perfect for each of us as individuals. Encourage people to not see tithing as a competition.
University: Keep looking at transition groups .. there are so many. Some are very “ex-mo” and antagonist. Other groups are more nuanced.
I found a local group that is accepting of my faith journey that includes a devout husband. We have done two camping trips with the group and a number of parties. It has felt like the support of a ward without judgement. For me, that support has been helpful.
Thank you for the update of your life. Drop in occasionally.
Big hugs.
— AP
Quote:Jerseygirl wrote:
Do not attempt to isolate yourself either by pretending to not be grieving or by physically shutting others out.
In the gospel we make a covenant to mourn with those that mourn….
For my family, in times of grief, meals were brought and people came to grieve with us at the funeral. Then, they just kinda wanted us to be over it already. It wasn’t out of pettiness or meanness. It was simple lack of experience combined with too much earnest desire to have our family be a community LDS MormonAd for How To Grieve. Too many people had opinions on a process that should have been ours.
The scripture is all about mourning with those who mourn. The assumption in that statement is that the grieving person gets to set the pace on that journey. They are not helped, comforted, or validated by the arrival of a Speed and Sprinting Coach. The hurdles of our lives are of such a height that no one can really give advice how to best clear them as we move down the track of our lives. In hindsight, I realize that my race didn’t include anyone but me on the track and a savior at the finish line. Some of my hurdles — I spent years learning how to clear them. I think God would have been just as pleased to see me crawl under them, walk around them, or pick them up and hand them off to my coach.
It was my church community that had expectations of how high and how fast I could run the course. They had never run the course themselves, but they expected me to clear the course as if I had been an Olympic-trained hurdler. I wasn’t and I didn’t.
They all left disappointed as I spent my first days of grief looking at hurdles from different angles and never even began the race. By the time I was ready to race, the stands were empty. Only my coach and the savior at the end of the track had stayed. That made it perfect.
