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I am glad you had a good day at church! Being open with people at church I assume must feel really nice. Kumahito wrote:I can’t imagine the Brethren want young, impressionable elders and sisters lurking in the corners of the Interwebs where they might find un-correlated history and doctrine.
:angel: This is my opinion also!
I am sorry Silent Dawning that you are dealing with this! Hang tough, your situation will pass! However, I see a tremendous opportunity here for you and your family. This is a great opportunity for your daughter to realize that life is not fair and you sometimes need to make the best out of a tough situation. In addition, your new job whatever it is could bring all kinds of great new things into your life.
Have you tried explaining to your daughter that if you possibly don’t move you will not be able to pay for things like clothing, food, education, YW camps and housing?
CWALD make some great points! Your 14 year old daughter is probably just scared about the prospect of change and giving you the cold shoulder is just her coping mechanism. It is part of a teenagers job description if you ask me.
I strongly feel that the most important thing is that you and your wife are on the same page.
mackay11 wrote:By the way, your blog mentions ‘fees for ordinances.’ That’s a new one on me.
I would be afraid that comment in particular would get kristmace dragged back into the Bishop’s office and possibly alienate himself from people at church. Just my two cents.
SilentDawning wrote:I’m sticking with my plan.
Sorry if it sounded like I was trying to get you to change your mind. I totally understand not wanting to rock the boat, particularly in your home. Sometimes in life we have to make sacrifices for the sake of making our families happy. Best of luck!
serene wrote:The other thing is she asked me if I’d be willing to be baptized in about 2 weeks. I told her I need more time to consider that & I don’t think they were happy about that decision.
Don’t let anyone pressure you into getting baptized if you are not ready or if you don’t want to. What’s the rush? Best of luck to you regardless of what you decide!
SilentDawning wrote:Yes, it does stink. But remember, we are rarely ever totally, brutally honest with people. In my work, I just got a new boss. She is a micromanager, unappreciative, punitive. The two managers under her both submitted their resignations recently, and veteran employees have left her office in near tears after she has evaluated their performance.
IMHO, honesty or being open with family as compared to a boss are two different things in my book. Not telling your boss that she is unappreciative and punitive is just being smart.
Old-Timer wrote:I stopped worrying about the next life a long time ago, and now I focus on this life.
Words of extreme wisdom if you ask me! Instead of worrying about what will happen when I die, I try to focus on living this life to the fullest.
I have no problem with any church charging money to use its parking for people who are attending a professional football game across the street. It is a pretty smart idea in my opinion. momto11, I want to say that I am very sorry you are dealing with your health problems. Health problems can be really distressing. Last night I included you in my prayers and I will do the same tonight.
Old-Timer wrote:Quote:3. Having to lie to your family stinks
I agree, but nothing Silent Dawning said in any of these comments is a lie. That’s important to realize.
Sorry, I didn’t mean to imply that Silent Dawning was lying. What I should have written and was trying to communicate is that not feeling free to be open with your family members can stink.
Sorry you are feeling blue! Depression stinks. In the past, I have dealt with depression. What helped me was seeking professional help. Not a Bishop, but a Physician. Talk therapy also really helped me. Rigorous exercise 5 times a week and proper nutrition I believe help keep me depression free these days. In addition, I stay consistently busy with work, social activities, church and hobbies. I believe idle time can really mess with depressed people. I still have anger management problems but I think they are getting better.
Church actually helps me with my mood and anger. It gives me a great deal of peace and happiness. However, I do have some problems with stuff at church. Not every person or organization is perfect including myself.
I’ll include you in my prayers tonight momto11. Stay positive and hang in there!
I would answer your children honestly and tell them the exact same thing you told all of us one here. Except maybe in a manner that would be easy for your children to understand. Personally, I believe if you are not honest with your children you are doing them and yourself a serious disservice. This is my belief for four reasons: 1. You have a right to be honest about your feelings
2. Let you kids know that it is okay to not fit the mold of a typical Mormon so they don’t experience the same feelings you experience someday when they are older
3. Having to lie to your family stinks
4. Keeping secrets can impact you negatively emotionally and physically
cwald wrote:8 families? Reports about families sacrament meeting attendance?
8 families! This is my main objection to home teaching. In addition to callings, tithing, cleaning up the church building, feeding the missionaries once a month and my career I simply don’t have the time. I would have to quit my job or start working part time to meet all the demands the church places on me. I only have four people I am supposed to home teach and I think that is too much. 1 or 2 would okay.
This is just my opinion, I think you should post whatever you want as long as you are willing to deal with the backlash that could transpire. It already seems like you have dealt with a backlash, part of me would hate for you to deal with anymore drama. I’m not sure how this current situation you are in kristmace impacts you and your family on a daily basis. Are you not afraid of getting dragged back into the Bishop’s office again?
Sorry to say this, but I would hate to be in your shoes right now. Being publicly outed and possibly viewed in a negative light by my fellow ward members would really bother me. While I don’t agree with every policy the church or church members advocate, I really respect, enjoy and appreciate my fellow Mormons.
I think every Mormon who is disaffected/annoyed etc.. with the church has to be careful with what we say and write considering church culture and procedures. It is hard for me to say that because I am a big believer in free speech and being genuine.
However, I support you fully in whatever route you want to take kristmace. Best of luck!
