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mackay11 wrote:
I have a demanding job, Mon-Fri I’m rarely home before about 8 or 9pm (often midnight), we live abroad and my wife is not active. She tolerates me taking the kids to church on a Sunday, but would probably prefer I didn’t..
First and foremost, I give you a great deal of credit and respect for working such long hours to support your family. That is the sign of a man in my book!
What I don’t understand is why you want a time consuming calling in the first place due to the fact that you are busy working so much? Wouldn’t you rather spend time with your family?
I’m just thinking that since your wife might have a “dim” view and you are probably not spending time with her at Church on Sunday, throwing in another activity that could occupy Saturday might not be a good idea. Sorry, just my two cents. Good luck to you regardless of what you decide.
Kumahito wrote:I’m trying to tread delicately here. I don’t think it’s my place, or anyone else’s, to tell people what they can and can’t “know.” While I don’t profess the same level of certainty that others might on religious and church matters, I don’t begrudge them the ability to “know” something.
Thanks for writing that Kumahito! That’s music to my ears. After reading what you wrote, I immediately said to myself I’m too opinionated about others opinions! If someone at Church expresses happiness in what they “know”, I should just be happy for them! If only I could put this into practice.
Sorry you are upset Donna. Have either you or your husband tried to go ask for different callings? Maybe just mention that you would love to help out more? Stay positive! I’m sure you will be able to work on getting aquatinted with your ward. Its strange to me as a convert that someone would let a stranger from church that could be a total psycho be assigned to their family to “ensure” anything. My Dad was able to be a spectacular father without the help of strangers. The purpose seems to be to keep the family and children involved in the church. When in fact, that might not be in the best interest of the particular family. I as a man will decide what best for my family, not a stranger! Don’t the men on here find home teaching offensive? Do you really a total stranger to help to raise your family? When I need help I turn to people whose loyalty is to me first and not the church. Don Corleone said never go outside of your family! I believe that.
I find home teaching demeaning. Sorry everyone! However, I believe if you enjoy it you should be free to participate in it. Live and let live.
Good luck in your new calling Canuckle!
SamBee wrote:Of interest…
The LDS Church and Utah Statistics
http://fairlds.org/authors/scharffs-gilbert/the-truth-about-the-god-makers/xii The bilingual stat interested me. That strikes me as definitely LDS influenced. While immigrants and native Americans factor in on it, it’s obviously partly down to the old MTC…
Great link! Thanks.
Roadrunner wrote:Hypothetical question- would “responsibly made” pornography make it more legitimate or lessen some of the abhorrent aspects of it? Say for example a Utah based company started making films featuring married actors and somehow marketed to married couples or at least to adults only. Actors were in no way coerced or conditioned to make the films because of past abuse. Maybe the actors also do the filming and editing to decrease the number of people irresponsibly tempted by it. Again just a thought experiment.
This may be the same as asking – is it morally acceptable under any circumstance to view pornography?
I don’t know the answer to that question. My wife enjoys reading pretty steamy romance novels (heaven bless them)
There is a sliding scale of acceptability and the farther you go to the more “permissive” end the more people agree that its unacceptable.
Responsibly made? I think everyone would agree that anything with minors, animals etc is unacceptable. But what you find “permissive” and “unacceptable” sexually is totally subjective. Sexually, people like different things.
Dax wrote:Again I ask if people in the church were allowed to masturbate without porn would that alleviate the need/desire to use it to such addictive levels? Would peoples natural urges be taken care of to the point that we wouldn’t need to have a 100 talks on it and abstinence?
Dax, I have to answer your first question with a question. Sorry. Where are people in church getting this information that it is at such additive levels? Is there a study? My point is that I don’t think it’s an issue that needs to be discussed with 100 talks in the first place.
To answer your second question about masturbating without pornography helping to alleviate the need to look at pornography, I honestly don’t know! Porn lost it’s luster with me as a teenager and I don’t really masturbate because I live with my non LDS girlfriend.(Not trying to be graphic)
What other churches, people or any other groups do any of us know that are so obsessed with porn/masturbation like we are? That to me is what I find fascinating.
Wow, I love that quote by Uchtdorf. Thanks for sharing it Ray! I know I personally need to stop judging people period! Sorry everyone if I got overly judgmental in this thread! Wouldn’t it be funny if they talk about porn at church tomorrow?
Mackay11- Sorry to hear about your struggles with porn. Kudos to you for dealing with it. I mean this with lots of love and not anger, but your response sort of pumped me up. Maybe it is because I am in recovery from drugs and alcohol. To me you sound like people at church and people I hear at meetings. I think you are painting it with a really broad stroke just because you have personally struggled with it. Just because I couldn’t drink responsibly, doesn’t mean others cannot. The problem is my addictive behavior, not how others view alcohol. IMHO, it’s a way to not accept responsibility. After all, most people can drink and look at porn without becoming full blown addicts.
If you think pornography deadens the soul etc.. , that’s your opinion and I respect that. However, just because you had a problem with it and couldn’t use it in moderation doesn’t mean that others can’t.
Mormons at church need to stop bashing porn or the industry and instead try focus on their own behavior! Clean your own house out before you go after someone elses house. Mormons should first stop selling (Marriots) and looking at pornography, then go after the porn industry. I feel like we are being hypocritical and puritanical.
Sorry everyone! I need to get off my soapbox and rant somewhere else.
I would take what this Mission President said with a grain of salt. According to “The Law of the Harvest”, 3 out 4 non U.S. converts are inactive within a year. 1 out 2 U.S. converts are inactive within a year. I have a hard time fathoming how a Mission President could really state or believe the figures he gave. http://www.cumorah.com/lawoftheharvest.html This is what makes me not believe sometimes. I feel like some Mormons misuse history/statistics to make themselves feel better about themselves being LDS. Deception is one thing, self deception in my book is way more scary! If the Church is true, why mess with the numbers?
I have been able to find out that Utah has the highest rate of literacy in the United States. Maybe I should blame that on the Church too? ( I’m just kidding!) SamBee wrote:Doesn’t Utah have the highest subscription rate of any American state?
If there are statistics to prove this, I would love to see them. I am not referring to you SamBee, but I feel like a great deal of anti-Mormon types use “Utah has the highest rate of…”, but I can never find where the statistics come from. Sorry, didn’t mean to threadjack.The constant obsession about porn among my fellow Latter Day Saints really bothers me. I get tired of listening to it. It strikes me as sad, depressing and disturbing. At church, I like to hear about Jesus and not porn. I wonder sometimes if the primary reason I don’t look at porn is because I didn’t grow up in the church. As a teenager I was never told that masturbation was a sin. Therefore, I looked at porn during my teenage years and got it out of my system. Sort of like playing with fire, I don’t see the attraction in my adult years.
I do believe that addiction recovery is possible in this life. I have struggled with addiction to drugs and alcohol in the past, I am able to stay sober by daily dedication and by working a program.
Personally, I am very concerned by your post. I feel like the church guilts people and makes them think they have a problem. Just because a man likes to look at porn, that doesn’t mean be is an addict IMHO. The solution to my substance abuse problem is to abstain from addictive substances. But how can you abstain from having sexual urges the rest of your life? The church seems to set people up into an endless impossible cycle of guilt, shame and seeking repentance from men at church. It is my personal opinion that many at church have an unhealthy view of sex in general.
If you really think you have a problem, please see a trained medical professional. I’m not sure that most Bishops have the proper training to make a diagnosis regarding mental health and addiction.
