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Wow sounds like you are in a tough spot. maybe you can ask help from sisters in the ward . maybe they can share their experiences of how temple attendance helps them spiritually In regard to Green Apples ex girlfriend’s father who was anti-military and encouraged your ex gf to break up with you: that majorly sucks !!! amazing that you found the very reason why your ex gf broke up with you. not many get to find out the true details of the intermeddling that can go on behind the scenes of breakups that do happen to us with people that we really come to care about. it kind of reminds me of my own situation that brought me to a faith crisis over a decade ago. i felt inspired to pursue a woman in my ward but she was 8.5 years younger. I felt there was so much intermeddling going on that i felt there was very little chance of me even getting an opportunity to date this woman. in spite of it i held on until she married someone else.
Maybe God wanted me to marry her but he knew there would be meddlers involved. in the end she moved away out west and soon after got engaged. in my humble opinion the meddling started from day one. in the end her moving away was a direct result of meddling members who felt she needed a new start away from that ward.
it is history now but that meddling by ward members really sucked. it was what lead to my faith crisis. it is history now but in spite of it i got through it and i am a better person for it. people meddle and unfortunately for some of us who are recipients of that meddling, it can really suck – but it doesn’t just happen at church and as we know it that it can happen anywhere.
sounds like you could be suffering from church involvement burnout. lds culture encourages making church life and attendance central. i have experienced this myself. when i experienced my faith crisis years ago and wanted to take a break from church i felt trapped and smothered by church. i had to stop going for my own sanity. one of the reasons i felt trapped and smothered was because i had reasoned in my own mind that if i stopped going i wasn’t “enduring unto the end”. i just came to realize that that was just silly to believe and i stopped going for a while anyway. it did help but even after re-attending i still needed healing and time away from the church for a while to try to make sense of what i believed and why i believed what i believed.
Hi SD, i know too well that living situation because i have been in it myself. i couldn’t tolerate it any longer and moved out. there were other reasons i ended that marriage but that was definitely one of the big issues. the mother in law was no help and developed a real hate on for me for leaving her daughter – but i did so for my own sanity.
Instead of looking at it as God rejecting you as a potential husband just look at it as something where, for whatever reason God stepped in because he has a sense that this girl wasn’t right for you or your future. i have had two premonitions after i married that my marriages were doomed to fail.
we have to use our intuition when we date and prayer can be that last step we take to decide whether to continue or not in a dating relationship.
as Hawkgirl pointed out we might be too inexperienced or just too dumb to be intuitive in our dating decision making.
i had one experience where i felt God wanted me to marry a certain someone and in the end it just caused or lead to highly unpleasant social situations at church that lead me to a faith crisis.
Your reasoning makes sense. some individuals have awful realities to live through. personally i think the HUGE reason God put us here is for us to gain a physical body and along with that comes a physical reality.
I too have thought does God really want us to “worship” him ?
personally the idea of a God wanting to “worship” him sounds kind of self-serving. i prefer to see God as a parent who isn’t looking so much to be worshipped but is only looking to be acknowledged – much like how a good parent likes to hear from a child that has left home from time to time. Orson makes some good points too.
The stake leader has a great attitude and makes a lot of great points. i hope he can really really shake things up and draw people out of that passive state he is talking about. Great article and good news that these individuals mentioned have returned. what has helped me hang on to believing Mormon theology has been attending church at other denominations because i can fill the gaps that they teach with what i know/learned from Mormonmism. helpful too has been my study of ufo/alien phenomena. one ufologist i follow has referred to “the veil” and just reinforces my lds beliefs. it helps too that the p of gp supports the truth about life on other planets. lastly – my spiritual experiences have also served as a beliefs anchor. what does MDD stand for ? DBMormon, you are a new face here for me. I read some of the earlier posts here and CWald told us more of your background at MDD.
i appreciate your comment:
Quote:You know what is so strange….. on this board I am the TBM who is advocating Faith. Yet I have the exact same views on the MDD board and there I am an apostate who is destroying the church… sorry was just thinking about that and felt I should post it.
By the way…. There is a distinct difference in how people are treated in the two boards and I just wanted all of you to know that while I am at a different end of the spectrum then many of you, you have been so kind and friendly, and welcoming. I just wanted to say thank you as your Christlike behavior very much shows through. While others see you as the fringe members it is apparent that in some areas you have the gospel mastered!
i think that is partly why i have chosen not to bother with LDS church participation – i just don’t like a judgemental social atmosphere. I loved my past spiritual connections with the LDS church but i sure hated the lack of warmth i’d sometimes get from members or leaders who, for whatever reason, chose to look down on me.
Mike
