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Very good thoughts. Thanks for them. I think that I am still trying to figure out what is “normal” for me and wondered if I should pursue the norm that I once had.
I know that a lot of people experienced anger and such when they discovered all of this. I don’t feel anger, I don’t really feel anything. Did anyone else do that? I just don’t care. Maybe I will later.
I am so sorry to hear how it went, cwald. I don’t have any advice for you that would differ from anything else that has been said, but I wanted you to know that I felt for you and the situation. Must have been the week for it, I guess. We skipped out on a it too because of my husbands nephews birthday party. My husbands side isn’t active at all. We went to a local amusement arcade and played for a few hours. It was a lot of fun! But it did feel pretty strange not to be at church on a Sunday. This is a really good thread. I haven’t really had the “opportunity” to have this kind of a situation happen to me so this is really good for me to see how I could/should handle it. I have to admit that I am having some anxiety in meeting with my bishop when they release me. He and I have butted heads in the past since we both have strong opinions.
doug wrote:I think I have been more likely to ‘accept’ spiritual experiences from those outside the church. Probably part of the reason is that those in the church invariably use them as proof that the church is ‘true’. Once I begin to accept them just as an indication that God operates in people’s lives, things tend to calm down.
I am the same way, Doug. I have a hard time when try to convince me of the truth of the church based on some experience they have had. If I can step back and say “This happened to them because God loves them just as he loves others” then I am Ok with it. If only some of those would realize that others have spiritual experiences even if they are outside of the church.
That is a great idea, SilentDawning! Let us know how it goes. cwald- I know what you mean. That is why I would include a note on it because I don’t like to eat something I don’t know where it came from either.
SamBee- I don’t know how it would work for small children. I imagine the children wouldn’t need a recommend unless they were past the age of 8 and then the family would stand in as proxy for the deceased parents.
Brian/Ray-
You actually bring up something that I have thought a lot about (procreation in the afterlife). I have always been troubled by the idea that we would be Gods/Goddesses of our own worlds and that we would be like God to those worlds. Here is why: I have never liked the idea of us coming to earth with no memory of the pre-existence, allowed to flounder and find our way. Hoping that we were not sent to some 3rd world country where we would starve to death or something. As a mother, I can’t imagine being a “heavenly mother” and sending my children down to experience such a life with no memory of being loved and wanted. Of sending my children off to something unknown to them and just hoping they made it back to me.
So then, that brings me to the afterlife and becoming Gods/Goddesses. If you look at the whole mind blowing eternity idea if we are to pro-create in the afterlife and have spirit children and we create a world. By the time we create a world and whatever else it involves then we have a gazillion spirit children. Since these spirit children are just spirits and live in heaven they really don’t know what is joy or sadness so they are just content. Then we decide that for them to have joy they must go to our world and have a body and thus the cycle repeats itself. The same cycle that we are in. Maybe this is what happened to us.
And that is why I don’t want to pro-create in the after life. I don’t want to create this for others. Personally, I like the idea of living in contentment with those that love me and are around me. I don’t want to be the missing Heavenly Mother figure. That just doesn’t make sense to me and makes me very sad to think that is what happened.
What are your thoughts on that?
Agreeing with what Ray said. A small service that you could do that wouldn’t “feel” to servicey is to bake some cookies and take it to someone. You could even drop them on the door step if you don’t want to interact, just tape a small note (or not). But I know that taking baked goods to some of the older people in the ward always is a good experience. They just like to have company.
Doing that just requires you give up a dozen of the cookies you made so you have some still for your family and you have done a kindness to someone else. Try that and see how it works for you.
It is good that they allow it. I guess it is part of my “feminism” that it annoys me that I can’t choose to be sealed eternally here like men can choose it. Don’t get me wrong, I am not an extreme feminist (the kind that wants the priesthood or things like that). I just think it is lame that some things are not equal. And just to avoid anything, PLEASE don’t tell me how amazing it is to be a mother and that you (as men) would rather have that than the priesthood.
🙄 I have told my husband, in jest (but there is always some truth in jest), that in the event of my passing he is to wait until I visit him and tell him that he can marry for eternity to another one because
Ineed to give approval on that kind of thing. 
Soon you guys are going to think me the most agreeable person ever because I think that you are all correct in everything you say! Within this past week I have found such peace in finding that I can still be a good person and not have to do everything the way someone else thinks it should be done (micro managed in a church sense).
This is so good for me because it has made my life easier and made it more “heavenly”. I actually feel like I can be a more effective mom to my kids now because of this. And that alone is a heavenly feeling!
I echo the kudo’s on this. Ray and Enoch have said exactly the things that have bothered me for so long. I really dislike the sacrament meeting talks about “every member a missionary” and “how to look for opportunities to share the gospel”. Those always made me uncomfortable. I have always felt that your example of doing good is more beneficial than giving someone a book of Mormon in hopes they become converted. And it especially drives me nuts to hear that my non-member friends will be upset with me in heaven because I never tried to convert them!
I think SilentDawning is spot on. I haven’t ever really thought about how it would be run because I figured we would all know what we should be doing, and because we are perfect, we would do it. I guess that would be my heaven because I REALLY don’t like to be micro-managed.
Excellent points that have been brought up. Thanks! Ray- you are spot on there. That is what I have had such a hard time with on the guilt end of it all. I was having a hard time with the thought that I “had the truth” and have turned away from it so I had no chance at celestial glory. It was very difficult to digest that I would be sent away because I had questions that couldn’t be answered. And then it would make you upset that you were ever introduced to mormonism in this life because (IMO) it would be better to have it in the after life when the questions could be answered.
That is so true, Bridget_Night. I don’t like the “fear card” being pulled all the time. If God is really so loving how is it that he would condemn me for the “misunderstandings” I have about the gospel. I have tried the promise about praying and seeing if I can get a response and never felt like I got a real affirmation of anything.
