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I teach at a high school. I can tell you that high school girls are annoying. However, they still have their sweet moments. Boys are just as annoying but not so unpredictable. As far as advice, I can give none. I have failed in that department.
As with most things with the church, I am quite confused. My very close friend who is a stake president, told me last month that the tone from HQ is one of working with people. Nine years ago, he said, HQ wanted SP to “discipline” the members. He said now they are supposed to work with the faithless and avoid church court. He commented on what a sharp contrast it hS been. So, to see the church HQ now reversing confuses me.
I just thought I might share my little insight.
DJ, i am both happy and scared for you. Nevertheless, good luck. I am having some of your issues on a much smaller scale. I am a ward missionary. Almost every week, they talk about baptizing and hastening the work. Every time I speak up and remind them that the Bishop called us and just asked us to just be friends with people. I like the people(inactives and non lds) I met recently. I want to have them as friends. It feels as though the others see them as fresh meat. I am honestly afraid I am going to be released because I see it differently.
So, anyway, best wishes. I hope you can make some people feel more comfotable.
Thanks for the responses. I see that i am reading more into it than i should. I know that Jesus wept. I try not read too much into it. It just bugs me. As i have struggled with some addiction problems, I can tell you how I feel. I have little or no doctrinal basis for my belief. It is just a feeling. I feel as though we are all saved regardless. One of the things I felt strongly as i tried to recover and failed is that it is okay. It is almost as if the savior had told me it is okay. I felt he was saying to just keep trying. ( the doctrinal part is that I felt him saying he took care of it and to quit worrying about it). In my view the sins are not that big of a deal. It is the consequence of our sin that is the big deal. For instance, the act of adultery(sex) is not bad. However, the damage it does to your spouse and family is what will be held in judgement. The true sin is that you have hurt someone else. Even victimless sin hurts others sometimes.
Does anybody else see it as I do? This religion stuff really confuses me sometimes.
Many years ago when my oldest son was trying to make decisions on his future, I sat down and told him that he needed to take time out of his life to either serve his God or his country. He chose to do neither. He still struggles in life. I think either of those would have helped him quite a bit. I still think the mission did me some harm but overall it was good for me to go. I hear the same things of people that do military service.
I think this a fun activity to think about. I have changed my mind about this a couple of times the past few days. What it has boiled down to is that I do not regret going and even somewhat cherish that time. However, it would be a miracle if I did it again. In other words, i would have to be physically carried by angels to the MTC to feel comfortable with it…
:angel: Sounds like a lot of us had similar experiences. I am truly grateful I went. I had some great experiences. I think I could have had some great experiences by staying home too. In short, I won’t go again.
DJ, this bugs me too. My wife, who does not question too many things, has a real problem with this. I have been teaching at a high school for twenty years. There have been 19 best classes ever. The twentieth will come in about six weeks.
It is difficult at times. You might even be attacked by mormon who dont believe as you do. A good example is somebody in Utah that finds out you are a democrat. They look at you like you just killed a kitten.
:crazy: It boils down to it being their issues and not yours.
Fwiw, I have a little experience with what you are going through. I have had my issues with porn and low self esteem. I am fifty years old now and still struggle with self esteem. I dont have advise on that. What helps me now is that i have a little confidence in my abilities. In other words, I have achieved a few things. As for the porn, the best help for me was the Addiction Recovery Program of the church. I don’t know how it would be in a college town. The whole institute might be attending. Young and religious people tend to try to out-righteous each other. At least in my experience. His needs Her needs is the best relationship book I have ever read. Dr. Laura wrote a book called ten stupid things men do to ruin their relationships….or something like that.
As far as a mission, it is totally up to you. Dont let guilt put you there. Dont worry about age either. If you want to go, go.
Personally, i like that i went on a mission. But, i probably should not have gone because it nearly destroyed me emotionally.
Doubt this helps but things do eventually get better.
Thanks for the help. I just did not want to be annoying but it seems that you don’t mind if I ask a question that has been answered multiple times. Thanks again.
Since we are on this topic, I will share a personal struggle. When I was TBM I tried to figure out part of my patriarchal blessing. It said I would have to cast out Satan at times. This has caused me much angst. I tried so hard to be ready and worthy to cast him out. Now I figure it put too much stress on me. So, if there comes that time, God better tell me out loud or I will miss it. Either way, it is nothing I can do now. As I think about my personal dilema, I wonder if it is more about personal struggle than actual being. I have felt for years that if satan were in fact real, he could cause me far less damage than I cause myself.
I struggle with some of the doctrinal things because I have only been taught lds views. I am still a believer for the most part, I just can’t live it.
Anyway, DJ thanks for letting us think about this.
Anybody got any insights on casting out Satan?
I think it would be appropriate to ask to talk on the phone. I also think it would be funny to ask to text each other. Then, you could put the little emoticons after you say no. 👿 We all have seen the abuses of welfare. We rarely see the person that is totally broke and just tries to survive. I believe there are more of the latter. I am a fan of fast offerings. I believe they, for the most part, go where they need to go. But, it also does not hurt to look for those that might need help and give them direct assistance. I believe taking care of the poor and needy is more about us as individuals than about institutions and governments. Quote:Fortunately, CT, we have come to realize that any actions by our children do not make us bad parents or failures. If such were true, God would be the biggest failure of all. That doesn’t mean we don’t care or that we don’t want him to get hurt – that is indeed the essence of the problem.
Thank you Dark Jedi. I am still trying to realize that my childrens’ actions don’t make us bad parents. I have just seen so many flaws in what we did or didn’t do as parents. Your statement that God would be the biggest failure of all made me start to see my feelings of inadequacy might be unjustified. It will take me some time but at least you got me started. Thank you for saying something that gave me an aha moment.
Good luck with your son.
