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Yes, It does sound like you have a major reverence problem in your ward, as do many. My only advice for you is to try your best to stop focusing on the irreverence of others. The more you look for it, the more you will find. I practice both yoga and meditation in my home. I also have 5 little kids running around who make a lot of noise. I am constantly amazed at the ability I have to inwardly find my meditative state and feel a high level of peace, despite what could be distractions all around me. It is definitely a learned skill that took a little time to develop.
Church is one of the few places that you can go, were you should EXPECT a reverent environment. But unfortunately, it to can fall short. Sometimes all you can do is find and focus on the reverence within yourself.
I read this article as well. It made me very sad. My temple marriage (17 years ago) was very bittersweet. None of my siblings, cousins or friends were able to attend because the had not yet been through the temple. My grandparents whom I loved dearly could not attend because they were not members. The ceremony itself was a train wreck! The man who married us was a lifelong neighbor, my former stake president, stake patriarch and current temple president. He seemed like a good choice. Before he would marry us (and in front of everyone) he spent about 20 minutes trying to talk us out of getting married! It was awkward, uncomfortable, and down right upsetting. Finally and reluctantly he married us. It wasn’t until later I learned that that same morning he had learned that another couple he had married the week before had decided to have their marriage annulled, and he took his frustrations out on us!
I truly believe that such a special day should be shared with ALL of your loved ones, regardless of there faith. I would LOVE to see the temple open to ALL for wedding ceremonies.
swimordie wrote:My DW read it and was wondering why in some countries the church waives the one year waiting period for couples who must marry civilly.
It was my understanding that these are the countries in which it is required by law to have a civil ceremony because our temple marriages are not considered legally binding.The church therefore does not “punish” them by making them wait a year. (I heard in England you only have 24 hrs to get your fanny to the temple or wait 1 year. Not everyone has a temple nearby!) I think as long as you were “temple worthy” this would be a great policy everywhere! (I don’t think a time limit should be imposed either) I know I would have definitely been interested in having a civil ceremony if I knew I could also have a Temple ceremony soon after. The thing is… there is a stigma attached to those who get married civilly, and then have to wait a year. It is assumed that they were unworthy, and a lot of speculating about immorality. I spent my whole life preparing for a temple marriage, so I certainly did not want people thinking I wasn’t worthy.
I love symbolic jewelry, and have always wanted to have and wear a cross. I never have for reasons the same as you. I have never seen anyone in church wear one, but if I ever did I would be impressed that they were courageous enough to wear such a beautiful and meaningful symbol, which obviously means something to them. I have always heard that we don’t use the cross as a symbol because we don’t want to focus on Christ’s death, but rather his resurrection. Yet, the cross is such a recognized symbol of Christianity. Are we not Christians? I don’t get how a cross should in anyway be a negative thing to wear.
Welcome! I am new to this site as well, at least new as a member, but I have already found it to be a great source of strength. I got the impression from your intro that your husband is supporting you along this journey of truth. If so, that is wonderful! (also something I envy a bit) I have five children whom I would love to share some of my feelings with about religion. In fact, I homeschool them, and we study the gospel in depth, yet I still feel forced to keep the majority of my feelings to myself. I do my best to bring them love and awareness of all people and faiths, and my belief that truth and knowledge can be found anywhere. I feel I am doing the best I can considering my husband does not support my views, and both of our large TBM families would be devastated if they knew all my true feelings. I wish I felt free to be more open with my family, but I fear the inevitably consequences. (I have tested the waters a bit – not good!) Anyhow, enough about my struggles, the point is… you are in a great place. This forum is wonderful!
Euhemerus wrote:They discover that Jesus wasn’t asking us to believe the unbelievable, but rather to love the unlovable – something much more worthy of committing one’s life to attempt.
Love this!
Pres. Packer lives in my stake. The guy is a very old school, rule loving, by the book kind of guy. I think it has put added stress on those in leadership positions. (Especially those at the Stake level) I have heard a term used within the stake when people question what seems to be a ridiculous or unnecessary rule. It is called a “Packer Policy” 
Cadence wrote:Such as I have seen dinosaur fossils but that does not jive with my emotional state of belief so therefore they did not exist or at minimum I am not suppose to understand their relevance at this point.
Ha! My father-in-law says that their were no dinosaurs on the Earth. The reason for the fossils is because the Earth was created from land masses of other worlds that did have dinos! Gotta love it!
I was talking about this subject once with my father in law who served many years as a bishop. He confided in me that the majority of the time calls were NOT inspired, but were simple attempts to fill vacancies by scrolling through the ward list and choosing whoever that they think might say “yes”. He said he REALLY appreciated the input he would occasionally receive from members as to where they would like to serve. Just me… I can completely relate to your situation. I spend two hours every Sunday in primary presidency, when I am not doing sharing times, I can always be found subbing for other teachers or working in the nursery. I am also girls camp director, and I pretty much do my husbands entire calling for him as well. (He is in charge of the monthly cub scout pack meetings.) I don’t mind working in the primary, because honestly I dread going to GD and RS. I do feel extremely overloaded though, and have yet to say NO to a calling. I have made a promise to myself that if they ever try to call me to a leadership position… ex. primary president, I will say no.
I would love to take a break altogether, but I have a feeling that if I had no callings, I may stop going to church altogether. I feel closer to God outside of church than I do in, but I go for my children. It is a good place for them to be, regardless if I agree with all the teachings. I make sure to supplement their learning with those things I feel are most important for them to know.
Whatever you do… DO NOT read the article in this months Ensign. When is the Time to Serve – Elder Robert D Hales. It is a horribly insensitive article designed to make you feel guilty if you even dare think about turning down a calling!
Tom Haws wrote:I always thought it was lightning until my second conversion when I felt inclined to re-examine all my old perspectives. Since then I have assumed it might have been lightening, or brightening. After all, lightning doesn’t come from the east. But the dawning of a brighter day does. Maybe he is saying his second coming will proceed gradually until all flesh shall see it together. ???
We all know that God’s view of time in much different than ours. “A gradual dawning of a new day” could take hundreds of years!
“For as the light of the morning cometh out of the east, and shineth even unto the west, and covereth the whole earth, so shall also the coming of the Son of Man be.”The closer I study Christ’s arrival 2000 years ago (vs. what was expected) the more I wonder if it is possible that we have already missed it this time around. I AM SERIOUS! Mapleleaf… thank you for your insights. I would love to hear from more of you!
Wow… Thank you all for the wonderful and thought provoking comments on this thread. MWallace…. I loved the personal story you shared. Beautiful!
This is a subject that I have been thinking long and hard on. In church I have often been told that the best thing I can do for my children is lets them see me go to the temple often. My mother did this. I am not sure it had the positive effect it should have had on me because I often felt her church life was much more important to her than her family life. She spend very little quality time with us. (I have a close friend who refuses to accept any church callings because he does not want to be like his father of whom he never saw, unless he was being physically beaten by him. He is a GA!)
Anyhow. I homeschool my children. Service is something I try to make part of our daily lives. I personally think that the best thing I can do for my children is to let them see me serve others and involve them. I made an interesting observation recently when I was going over all the service projects my daughter has done over the last 2 years in YW while we were working on her Personal Progress Program. Every single church organized service she has ever done had limited their service to serving only The Church and its members. ex… baptisms for the dead, working at the cannery, cleaning the stake property, raking leaves at elderly (members) homes, writing letters to the missionaries, etc…
The focus of our service still seems to be primarily serving WITHIN our organization. As a church we are improving but we still have far to go. Fortunately I do believe that Pres. Monson is the right man to lead us in this direction. Serving is what he has always been known for, and inspiring the church to reach out to others, will likely be his legacy. I am hopeful of the direction we are heading, and I pray that those outside of the church, and in need across the world will begin to feel and be flooded with the positive effects of our service.
just me wrote:Amazing Grace-certain renditions just are so moving.
I Love the story behind this song. This one is also part of the
Reflections of ChristCD just me wrote:O Holy Night-All time favorite Christmas song. I looooooooove the “fall on your knees” part.
Gives you chills, huh!!
I have always been partial to primary songs. My favorites are “I Feel My Savior’s Love”, “My Heavenly Father Loves Me” (Whenever I hear the song of a bird…),
“A Child’s Prayer”, “I’m Trying To Be Like Jesus”, “As I Have Loved You, Love One Another”, and “I Am A Child Of God”
Interesting that every single one one these songs is either about Gods love for us, or following Christ’s example.
FYI… When my kids sing “I am a Child of God” instead of singing the line… “has given me an earthly home, with parents kind and dear” they instead sing… “with parents kind of weird.”
Also love “Come Thou Fount”. The
Reflections Of ChristCD is my all-time favorite. BEAUTIFUL! Steve-hpias wrote:I actually went through the temple after my disaffection. I had originally decided to serve a mission to get more dates, but upon reading Jesus the Christ, I came to what I believe is a genuine understanding and respect for the Savior. So when I took out my endowments, I felt that I was making covenants directly with God. Even if I eventually decided the church wasn’t true and never darkened the doors of the chapel again, I’d probably still keep wearing my garments (well, most of the time). To me, they represent covenants I made with God, not with the church.
Thanks for this thought Steve! I still wear my garments but have been contemplating not. I have been associating them with “the church” and not as a covenant just between me and God. I am now rethinking how I view them. Besides, I find them to be dang comfy!
Welcome! I am a newbie here too, at least as far as posting goes. I agree… I am SO glad this forum exists. It is so great to be able to freely explore all of my “issues” with an open and understanding bunch. I have felt so alone for years and my husband is still unwilling and unable to discuss these feelings with me. Its been difficult keeping them to myself. Herodotus wrote:Long story short, I started to see Mormonism didn’t have the monopoly on miracles. I saw more politics and less that Jesus-like behavior
I feel exactly the same way! I think miracles have more to do with one’s faith and believe in the power of the Universe/God, and nothing to do with what organized religion you belong to. Ditto on the politics observation. I am, however, a huge believer in miracles. I have been witness to many. You may be interested in the recent thread in this forum where we discussed modern day miracles. A lot of incredible stories were shared.
http://forum.staylds.com/viewtopic.php?f=11&t=1078 I hope you are able to find this forum to be a positive tool for you as you progress on this new and exciting spiritual journey.
Great post because I know exactly what you are feeling. A few years ago a was terrified when a came to the realization that I really did not like JS. I had always been taught the JS would be a judge in the spirit world, and it really scared me to think that I would be judged by someone I did not fully respect. (A great fear tactic on his part) I think the Church seems to thrive on fear. After all, haven’t we been waiting in “the final second of the final minute of the final hour” for the return of Christ pretty much since the church was founded? Not being good enough, not doing enough, not magnifying my callings and serving the church enough…. these things have always been at the top of most members minds. I think this is one reason that you find so many members using anti-depressants.
I have thought a lot about Heaven and Hell, and I would like to share my opinion. I do not see these as physical places as much as I see them as spiritual places. Heaven is a closeness to God, whereas hell is a separation from God. I figure that as long as I am working on my relationship with God in whatever way works best for me, than I am heading in the right direction.
