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Valoel, I was thrilled to see a discussion on history started. I never expected anything to come on your election day as I figured that would take precedence over any other topic.The First Vision is a great place to start. I respect the fact that you put so much time and effort into comparing the different versions. It is only mildly problematic for me, as well. I agree that it was embellished and given meaning over time, and possibly even right away. I actually entertained the thought early on in my membership that pretty much as soon as he told his family, meaning could have been given to this experience that was more grandiose than real . Like you said, nobody knows but him. It’s just that he was only 14 and came from a family that was religious and had high hopes for him so it isn’t difficult for me to believe that they may have played a significant part in influencing him and helping him to interpret the experience right from the start. I know that I sound skeptical and I don’t mean to because I do believe “something “transpired for him. I really appreciate you starting us off as this is exactly the kind of stuff that I want and need to see different perspectives on. It helps me to think things through in a positive and healthy way.
More later, I have to go to work.
Spiritually,I don’t know where I am at right now. I believe in God but I am at a loss as to what parts of the church I can embrace, if any. You might wonder why I want to be in staylds and the best reason that I can give is to just be honest and say that I don’t know. Currently, I am just going through the motions at church. I work a lot of Sundays and I go on High Council speaking assignments with my husband but stick to safe topics and keep it simple such as” loving one another”. I have only had to go to my own branch once in the last couple of months since my crisis hit me. I am intrigued as to how others stay lds and consider the possibility that if others can do it, maybe I can (through learning from others,somehow) as well. I know that I am very green. I am just starting to listen to the mormon matters podcats and I have ordered some books. I want to become more knowledgeable and be aware of all the pros and cons. Right now, I am still kind of in shock. I don’t want to react hastily. I need to consider everything from all angles and resconstruct a whole new belief system that I am content with. This will obviously take some time. Communicating with those of you that are striving to make it work (and have a lot more knowledge regarding church history, and still manage to keep it together) is a positive. I don’t really understand how it can be done but want to understand. So, at this point I am not sure that I can contribute much to help others in their journey but I am hoping that I can learn from each of you and soon be up on my feet and ready to help others.
I , too, am interested in growing as a person. For me, walking away from the church would not be hard but I am not prepared to do so without putting the work into it that would make it a very informed, conscious choice that I feel 100% good about. It is important not to side with emotions that are running high right now and I see this forum as a source of balance. So whether or not I meet the criteria, I don’t know. I don’t know much of anything these days except that I feel kind of like I was such a sucker to believe all that I did. What can I hang on to? What can I let go? It seems that most of you are further along in this work than I and I want to learn from you and understand how and why you are doing it.
Orson, I know that a connection had to have been made with the spiritual realm that day, or rather ,the spiritual realm connected with me. Pondering it for meaning? Well, I attach the same meaning now as I did then, God must exist. He is probably amazed that I even write this as He is probably thinking “what do I have to do, hit her on the head with a hammer?”
Valoel,
Since this crisis in my faith, I have been very much attaching to this experience, and I am grateful that I have that to fall back on. I have to give it the meaning that God heard and answered my prayer.I totally understand what you are saying about how we can easily misinterpret meanings and so we should be careful not to put our own interpretation on things. Within 3 weeks of this happening ,the missionaries came knocking on my door and I figured it was a sign of this being the church He wanted me to join. Part of me still believes that this “MAY” have been the case (even in light of me recently learning of it’s faults),because it did provide me with direction that I needed and put me on a straight and narrow path. Or, it could have just been a total coincidence that they showed up at that time. I am sure it will all be very intriguing after we die and see the big picture. I suspect it will all make a lot more sense than we can make of it now. I am in absolute agreeance that He leaves us to make our own decisions and I feel that He has a lot less to do with our everyday lives than a lot of people think.
Ray,
Interesting perspective. I always thought this to mean that each of us has either one or the other. Thanks for sharing, I appreciate it.
I really appreciate both of your opinions and advice. I think that if it were not for having this experience to remember, I would be a real mess right now. My apple cart has been totally flipped in regard to the church and apples are flying everywhere. I still find it hard to believe that I was so ignorant for so long and am still not sure how I can deal with it. YOUR SUPPORT REALLY HELPS. The reason I mentioned that my answer was not at the time of prayer was because I know that people can reach psychological states that we are not very familiar with because they are out of the ordinary. An example of this kind of altered state that I am talking about would be hypnosis. I have also gone to my sister-in-law’s baptism at another church and witnessed people fainting and falling to the floor when the preacher put his hand on their forehead. I do not believe in this instance that they were faking it. I believe they put theirselves into some sort of altered state without knowing it. The fact that the answer came later, when I was not even thinking of it , I believe discredits any such possible theory of this being the answer to what happened to me. Due to how I felt, I have to believe that this could not possibly have been from within me but had to have come from a higher power. I felt a strong unconditional love toward everyone for days afterward and it was a very euphoric experience. I just don’t believe I could conjure that up myself in any way. That being said, I will always hear another persons perspective because I never am going to be closed minded thinking I have the answers to anything ever again. You are right Valoel, the more we know, the more we realize that we don’t know. I may have not much else to hang on to right now, but I will always have that experience to come back to and I am grateful for that.
I hopeto get more input from others here yet. I am not sure how many members are in staylds. Maybe there are just a handful of us!
