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Brian, thanks for sharing your experience. I have recently returned to this site, because of the news over John D. so many things i have read at other sites have left me feeling so dark. It has been refreshing and helpful to come back here and read the many posts here at stay lds. I to, have had a few discussions with understanding Bishops, and Stake Presidents. Brian, thanks for your comments. I really needed the hear this topic from that perspective. I have “invested” so much of my life in the church, that I have come to believe that even though I may fantasize about what it would be like to leave the church, actually doing so would cause more hurt and pain. It is my hope that coming here to this site will help me to Stay… whether that be a middle way… personal way.. or being able to sift through misinterpretation between actual doctrinal and cultural confusion.
Oh, how I so wish my faith could be as it was when I was young. However, like John says in one of his articles once you have become aware of certain aspects of the church it is impossible to go back. That is where I find myself right know. And as others have also stated once you have “let the cat out of the bag” , it is impossible to put it back. I feel I must take great care in who I discuss this with. This makes me sad. I wish I could find validation from others in the church. (I should add, that even though, I was very honest about my lack of testimony, my Bishop and Stake President felt it was still appropriate for me to have a temple recommend so I could go with my daughter when she received her endowments to go on a mission)
I do not feel any connection with God. I am trying to work that out. I see others both in an out of the church that have that connection and I desire to regain it. So I am doing a little research on shame, and I am wondering if there is a connection between shame, cognitive dissonance, and not feeling connected with God.
HiJolly, Thanks for the recommendation. I enjoyed reading the article. I loved the symbolism and analogy of birth and partaking of the first tree. That was new to me.
A while back our gospel doctrine teacher, who was also our former Bishop and a retired institute teacher, taught a lesson on “the Fall”. His lesson helped me to see the topic on a whole new level. Before his lesson, I always felt confused by why God would give them(Adam and Eve) a commandment and then expect them to break the commandment. I never truly got a satisfactory answer to that question.
However, in his lesson he taught that when God said they should not eat of the fruit it was not a commandment but a statement of fact that eating of the fruit will bring a consequence not a punishment. ” 16 And the Lord God commanded the man, saying, Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat:
17 But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.”
In verse 16 he explains that eating of the fruit of all the other trees they can do free of consequence, but that the consequence of eating the fruit of the tree of knowledge will be mortality. Which I felt fit with the doctrine we have always heard that Eve knew she must partake that “Man Might Be”.
If you had not already heard of that approach to the fall I thought you might find it interesting.
Quote:our Bishop stepped over to the table, knelt next to him, put his arm around him and coached him through the prayer phrase-by-phrase – in such a way that nobody was aware of it until the prayer had ended and we saw him stand up and walk back to his seat.
Many years ago, my mother-in-law made a comment about how she disliked mothers day. I was shocked to hear her say that. However, over the years I have grown to feel the same. I often come home from those Sundays feeling inadequate compared to all the accolades for other amazing women.
Today was very different for me. Because we have so many missionaries coming home and leaving all at the same time they asked my daughter to give her farewell talk today. She spoke about how she has applied the atonement in her life and did a wonderful job expressing her gratitude and love for the Savior. I mention this because so often I have read comments about how little the Savior is mentioned.
I also enjoyed the concluding speaker, he too mentioned the savior and instead of giving grand and marvelous examples of motherhood, he shared how simple things his mother had done helped him recognize her love for him. He also opened his talk by staring a comment the sealer said at his wedding. I don’t know if I can get this right but it was something about how important Eve was and It would be erroneous to think she was simple left as an after thought. Instead God beautified and prepared the earth making it ready in honor of her. I hope I make sense, writing is not my favorite thing to do. I do love reading everyone else comments.
As a missionary many years ago, Elder Nelson came to speak to us. I remember feeling the saviors love as he spoke, since that time I have always respected and enjoyed listening to him. However, His statements about never finding peace in living as a cafeteria style mormon have been disconcerting. I was wondering if anybody else has had some thoughts about this and if they could share them with me?
