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I really like what Brian said and I have struggled with the some of the same things a little bit. I live not too far from Gilbert that I have seen a little. I don’t see him a lot because he charges way too much and no insurance. Last year it was 80. This year he is charging 90. He raised the price 10 bucks for cost of living! I have such a hard time spending that much money for one hour so I go about once a month. The counselor I saw was really nice and LDS. I was pretty scared I would offend him but I never did. I really liked him and he seemed to be very understanding. I remember one thing he said was that I just need to pray and do what I felt was right for me and not worry about what other people want me to do in regards to church activity and stuff like that. This guy is in Gilbert and here is his contact info.. Website:
His name is Russell Beazer
Phone: 480-649-6499
Ps. he was in bishopric but not a bishop for a short time
Also, I have learned from counseling that sometimes you pay a lot of money for the same things your friends might have said but you didn’t listen that close cause money wasn’t on the line. I really hope you have insurance! Also, if not this counselor might be able to help you with out insurance but email me to ask how and then I will give details.
I think I might have a hard time if my bishop says something like you have to do this and this first and then make a list of things or ask me temple interview questions to let me get it off. How many members are in good standing that don’t even go to church, pay tithing, wear garments or do anything. This was my husband for years and they didn’t take away anything from him.
I will be so depressed if this sort of thing happens. It just wouldn’t feel fair. But again I am possibly thinking about it all wrong maybe..
Good ideas and thank you. Only one problem is I sense that this bishop already knows my issues with the temple because my husband had a long talk with the new bishop when getting an interview for a calling said a bunch of stuff and also I talked just a little with last bishop. (what was I thinking?! ooops) Hopefully this bishop won’t require much or say that I have to do much of anything to come back and get it off.
SamBee I love the idea of having time to meet new people and socialize a little more. After all it seems just at church you see people but it’s not enough to get to know them really. I am having a hard time with getting bored at church lately. Today I felt like I was in kindergarten. I am not sure why we are using the gospel doctrine manual or whatever for relief society. I really didn’t learn anything from the lesson and found it hard to sit thru. Even when I bring my ipod it’s hard for me to relax or focus on anything outside my home. (I know that sounds stupid though)
One thing I did do during sacrament today was read a childrens bible to my son and he enjoyed that just as I did. I also talked during the lesson in RS meeting which might be bad but was kind of nice. Not a lot but just whispered and made comments and such. Also another thing that for some reason is easier than just reading is having my Ensign and highlighting words and things. I feel like I am doing something.
It’s hard too when there is less than 20 people in RS and most of them are not even close to you in age.
Today I did think about leaving church and going for a walk during Relief Society. I have a hard time getting out of church since my husband makes that hard but maybe I can get out of Relief Society meeting and just walk for a little bit or sit in the grass outside and think.
Hi Molly, I also haven’t had the same experience with ordinances that other people said I would. Maybe there are other people out there that don’t have grandiose experiences and that have similar experiences as you possibly and it’s ok? Can you reflect on your great experiences as a missionary or keep that in mind when you feel bad? Also, many people have never gone on missions or done anything like that. Maybe you can remember that you sacrificed a lot and did a lot more good than any little mistakes you may have made along the way.
I am sorry that you left feeling horrible and worse than you walked in. I can see why you would be very upset after talking with him when he didn’t even ask you or seem to care if you were sorry or not. And it sounds like you felt like he was not loving or caring about the whole thing.
Also, have you ever tried visiting a Christian Church? I remember I used to feel really guilty all the time in the mormon church for things. Little things even. I felt like I was never good enough and after visiting a Christian Church and listening to the music I just felt Gods love for me there for some weird reason. I never felt that way in lds church back then though. It might be helpful to take a break from church and just decide to try it again in a month or two or however long.
I don’t know if any of this helps much because honestly I am struggling a lot too. I hope you can stop feeling so guilty and feel good at church again somehow.
I read this post this morning and was thinking of it today when I was talking to my husband and kept this in mind. I am starting to understand how important it is to him that I believe or am with him at church and such. Thanks for posting. I remember a month or two ago a nice lady sat next to me and talked. She didn’t just say hi but asked questions about where I lived etc. etc. Then she gave me her phone number and told me that I could call her anytime if I wanted to talk or needed something. The phone number was nice. I felt like she didn’t mind if I ACTUALLY called her and she wasn’t just asking if I needed anything like a lot of people say (sorry but I am not sure if they are serious/honest all the time when they say that). Anyway, her giving me her number was nice and when I see her in Relief Society she always comes and sits by me and is friendly. Most people might say hi and forget about me after a month or say hi but never sit by me or give me a phone number.
I got a flyer at church today for a Halloween Party at the church. It said that no masks were allowed and also no cross dressing or scary costumes (or something to that effect) and it also said it was church policy. I think they don’t allow that for functions or events held at the church but I have never heard anything about not being allowed to have or wear masks on halloween. I am not sure yet what I am going to do as most my boys costumes that they have are scary or come with masks but I am sure I will find something.
I like Tom’s idea of blogging and having fun with conference. I listened a little yesterday and today but plan on re-visiting conference in the coming weeks. This is a little off subject but I do think that miracles are performed no matter what religion you are. Have you ever seen the show “It’s a Miracle”? I watched that show and I was amazed at all the miracles that occur to so many different people with different beliefs. I really hope that after you say no they don’t label you or treat you like a third class citizen. I said no to a calling once and it wasn’t the bishop that extended the calling. He seemed pretty offended when I told him my reasons why but then after that he was very kind to me and still said hi.
I really wonder sometimes though what type of records are kept in the bishops office. If it was the bishop and I said no would he write that down on a file under my name and the reason why? Could something like this exist on me now and future bishops will not give me a calling because I said no once?
I also loved President Uchtdorf’s talk. It was excellent! This was the first talk I heard and I tuned in right before he started talking. Can’t wait to re read the whole talk. I kind of wish everyone could hear that talk or people outside of our religion because it really was a good message I thought that could pertain to anyone do you agree? That is very true. That is something to think about next time I’m angry. I think it sort of makes me feel angry. I will say that sometimes I think I might rather get what I want rather than not get it at all or not in the way I want. But getting things the way I want is the best way to receive.
Reading this quote makes me think that maybe I shouldn’t want things so much or be happy with my situation or the way things are even if things are rather difficult.
Thanks for sharing!
I like Brian’s thoughts on fear… I also think that at times growing up afraid of my mom and doing things out of fear was not great. I was never happy. I was always afraid and sad. In the church I did a few things out of fear only and I didn’t feel good about it. Even when I did the thing I was afraid of not doing I didn’t feel good. I think I felt better when I stopped going to church and then decided/realized I wanted to go to church and I wasn’t worrying anymore.
Regarding your fear of destroying your chance to be an eternal family .. I have the same fear and struggle with the same thing. It’s kind of depressing to think about not going to heaven.
Sorry I don’t think that helps you but hopefully what I said made a little sense…
