[QuestionAbound]

hawkgrrrl wrote:

Question Abound: Speaking as a woman, garments make interest in sex at all pretty difficult. Feeling fat, frumpy and unattractive isn’t exactly a recipe for desire. Some women find that they need to forego them hours in advance to even become interested or receptive to sex. There’s a reason we used to call them “passion killers” at BYU.

And for me…I would rather hide behind clothing (of any kind) instead of letting my bellies hang out for my husband to see. 😆

I guess G’s keep me covered. ha!

PLUS, it helps to have something on in case a kid knocks at the door or barges in during cuddle time. :wtf:

To Curt’s comments, gotcha!!

Roy wrote:

From what I know of Curt, he is a man of moderation. Therefore, there could be extremes to:

1) Go to great lengths to keep the garment on in some form during sexual activity.

2) Remove the garment before any sexual activity to prevent defiling it – to include foreplay, flirtation, and caressing.

Both of these scenarios are just strange and impractical. I imagine that Curt is somewhere in the middle – as are the rest of us who use garments. I know that he would advocate personal judgement and what feels right and appropriate for you. It would be highly inappropriate for anyone (church leader or random people from the internet) to try and tell you what you should be wearing or not during sexual activity. “Teach correct principles and let them govern themselves.”

Excellent, excellent examples and summary.

And this is why I come here for discussions. I don’t contribute much, but I do learn a lot. At least…you all give me things to think about in a new way. :thumbup:

[QuestionAbound]

Yay for you!

I’m still teaching seminary and am grateful to be out of D&C. That just about did me in!

Teaching the NT and soon the BoM will be a good thing.

I’ll be following your posts and ideas!

Thanks for sharing!

[QuestionAbound]

Old Timer wrote:

I never wear it during any kind of sexual activity…

This is such a personal question, but I have honestly never considered that wearing garments during “any kind” of sexual activity could be defiling them. Like, this is a brand new thought to me and I’m super intrigued. I’m all about trying new things as I work through all of this, so…do you really take them off before “any” activity? Does your wife do the same?

I mean, I get that we need to work according to our conscience, but maybe you’ve found an idea that may help me (and others?).

Thanks!

[QuestionAbound]

My husband’s side of the family is devout Southern Baptist and their youth missionary trips look totally amazing.

I am so jealous that we don’t do such a thing.

I mean, we could pay $$ for the Humanitarian EFY, but that’s just a little extreme for me.

Anyway, our family…

They are out working WITH people to build things like schools.

They are out helping to dig wells.

They are out helping to care for new babies.

My cousin is very involved with a 3rd world school that we like to support.

I would love to see our missionaries do that very thing…help build and run a school…a clinic…something that could help others who find themselves limited by economic position.

[QuestionAbound]

jamison wrote:

My fifth Sunday was on family history getting names ready for the temple and yes, completing your 4 generations. ……. Awesome neighbors who share and care with no strings attached. Reciprocate that love and there is no onerous obligation, just cooperation and mutual respect.

I was busy with seminary prep, so I missed our lesson for adults, but my kids said that they learned about family history in their class and my teen son actually enjoyed the presentation. He also just came home from EFY, so the Spirit is strong with that one.

I love your sentence about good neighbors!

I have LONG said that if we all looked out for each other ON OUR OWN without having to “be commanded in all things,” then there would not even be a need for Visiting Teaching or Home Teaching…I mean, Ministering. We would just reach out because we WANTED to love our neighbor.

We are becoming friends with some new neighbors here (not members, no church community) and they are floored when we show thoughtfulness. Like, delivering a plate of cookies b/c I know it’s the mom’s favorite is monumental for them.

I’m thinking…eh, that’s nothing! But their expectations are SO low, that it humors me to see them get worked up about the smallest gestures. I guess church community training works.

Anyway, I would love to see a community of Saints (or anyone) who genuinely looks after each other.

Thanks for the plug.

[QuestionAbound]

I am currently teaching seminary and this past year was a HARD one for me.

I don’t like D&C. I don’t know that I believe that it contains true revelations.

I made sure that my co-teacher taught the parts of scripture that I knew that I could not.

I just bit my lip as the TBM co-teacher shared her testimony about what she was teaching.

I SO badly wanted to tell the students that the WOW was not meant to be by commandment…

I hope this fall is better.

[QuestionAbound]

LOVE this change, but this idea here…

“The Church asks for a simple ceremony”

Why do they think that they have that kind of power and can make that request??

I feel like a marriage ceremony is OUTSIDE of their reach — or at least, it should be. Kind of like how The Church stopped asking about oral sex in TR interviews (that was before my time). Some things need to be outside of the scope of The Church.

Bishops have a script that they must follow for wedding ceremonies.

I wonder if we will see couples asking their local protestant church leaders to conduct the ceremony and allow script changes.

In my state, couples can marry each other themselves…like, we don’t need clergy to do it. I’d like to see a ceremony like that! :clap:

My husband is bishop – I asked if he read the letter to mean that he has power to withhold authorization for a separate marriage/sealing.

He doesn’t read it that way, but “someone” is supposed to have that authority. Who?

[QuestionAbound]

My To-Change List:

[list]

[QuestionAbound]

Quote:

Last of all – Women can have their own Meeting. No men allowed/needed/required/requested. OR – The chicks get to come to Men’s Night. And sit, speak, lecture, etc.

Yep.

I love this.

I think we could all agree that women bring a perspective that men may simply lack.

That said, many, many men would scoff at having to listen to a woman talking to him at church. :wtf:

I lost all fuzzy feelings for the PH meeting when, as a teen, I brought a nonmember to church and walked him to the PH meeting. I fully intended to sit next to him during class (we were dating). I was stopped at the door (literally) and told that I was not allowed in. I explained that my friend was new and that I wanted to be with him. No-go. I still remember the embarrassment and frustration I felt then. A LOT would have to change for some women to feel those fuzzies again.

SEMINARY:

I am a seminary teacher (the crazy kind who gets up at 4:30am).

I love being with the kids.

I love those kids.

I hate teaching the D&C :crazy:.

I hate that I want to crash when I get home…but I can’t b/c I have 5 children still at home…and we homeschool…so…

I can’t imagine that seminary would change to online only

Teens would NOT take those classes.

Why?

Most of my students stay after school for activities and get home in time for dinner (or later) and then if they don’t also have other non-school activities, homework kicks in and then it’s bedtime b/c they, too, have to get up just a few hours later for seminary.

Many youth simply stay very busy.

Seminary would be lost on them.

AND, how many youth do you know that actually WANT to go go seminary? I do have those students, but I don’t have many.

For some of my kids…seminary is the only place where they get structured/formal gospel lessons. I think that is important. I know that the kids like the spirit they feel of seminary. I’m sure seminary isn’t going anywhere.

As for the credentials for serving a mission and needing seminary…those seminary certificates mean nothing to me.

We have students who come in with 10 minutes left in class. How do these kids still get credit for attending?

One kid (the 1C in the SP’s son) sometimes comes in for the closing prayer. How does he still get credit for attending?

I know that there are other kids like that who will still graduate after 4 years with a diploma in hand.

Yeah, not much behind that.

BUT, while we are on the topic of seminary…

I’d like a salary for teaching.

If full-time seminary teachers are teaching, say, 6 classes of seminary a day…and getting paid to do it…I’d like 1/6 of their salary.

Could someone put that request in for me? :thumbup:

[QuestionAbound]

Nibbler, I am that way with seminary this year. It is D&C and I just can’t any more. It has been bad.

SS is different this year b/c many members are relating the teachings to our every day lives in a way that they haven’t before. It is good to see them taking an active role in being a student.

I hope things get better for you!

[QuestionAbound]

dande48 wrote:

Yeah, my family has been a part of three different wards in the past two years, and there’s rumor the SP is trying to create a new ward we’ll become a part of. It’s funny… we’re 15 minutes away from two different buildings, and yet have to make a 30 minute trip each Sunday to attend “our ward”.

I am going to tip my cynical hat here… Are you sure this isn’t because we’ve changed to a two-hour block?

We also have to drive further for church.

Our first Sunday there and I get a seminary calling.

Two months later my husband is called as bishop.

We knew no one and only brought a few families with us from the other ward.

Stake kept several people for stake callings and they weren’t there on Sunday. It was awful.

That said, my children have made the most amazing friends here, so there’s that.

The 2-hour block. I doubt it. The people coming back have been gone for years. I doubt they had even heard about the changes.

I’d be interested to see how things shape up for you.

[QuestionAbound]

nibbler wrote:

I think at least a part of this effort is to coordinate what the kids are learning in seminary and SS.

1) Won’t the kids get bored with hearing very similar lessons in close proximity to each other?

Having canned lessons that are the same year after year was strain enough on youth (and adults) but I fear coordinating efforts to have very similar lessons week after week will accelerate that process.

2) I don’t know how it will work, but I’m assuming it won’t be correlated to the nth degree. Where the kids study lessons during the week in seminary that relate to the lesson they will have in church that Sunday.

What about kids on a traditional calendar (summers off)? Will they skip the middle of the curriculum in seminary to ensure the lessons line up with what is being covered in SS when school starts back up in the fall? I’m guessing/hoping they won’t try to correlate the schedules.

Your first comment: that’s exactly the reason for the change.

Bored kids? Maybe. A friend of mine with a seminary-age student asked me which book of Scripture the student should be studying. Should he study the Book of Mormon since we are to read from that every day? Should he study the doctrine and covenants since that is what they are going over in seminary? Should he study the New Testament with his family since that is what he would be studying in Sunday school?

In some ways, having one book of study for the entire year across-the-board may be helpful to some. N

Canned lessons: I don’t know about your Sunday school classes, but mine have become a very exciting place to be. I have actually enjoyed Sunday school this year. There aren’t really canned lessons anymore and those who have prepared during the week, with some incredible insight.

There will definitely be correlation. I’m quite sure that seminary kids will study the same stuff that their families are studying during the week so that they are prepared to bring those insights home and into their Sunday school classes.

Traditional schoolers: i’m sure that there will be a set number of seminary lessons, just like there are now so that they can accommodate a regular school year. I expect there to be no difference moving forward. Summer vacation will just be that… time off.

* it’s that summer vacation that has me wondering how the students will feel when they come back to seminary in a totally new grade, with new classes and pressures, but keep the book of scripture the same for the next few months… and then switch up the entire seminary class direction and a book of scripture over Christmas break.

I’m thinking logistically as a seminary teacher, I will have to take any decorations down over Christmas break and put new decorations and themed materials up before we meet for seminary again. Not a big deal, but also not totally ideal in my opinion.

Still, I may be totally wrong. I hope I am totally wrong. I hope this transition is an amazing thing.

So…my point is…maybe this change will really be a good thing.

[QuestionAbound]

And when you are married to an introverted narcissist?

Heaven help you – ’cause you’ll need it. :wtf:

[QuestionAbound]

Did we ever really know why there was a veil in place to begin with?

There is a lot of ideas and theories, but I’ve not seen it written down in a cannonized way before.

Even here on STLDS there are a lot of ideas, but nothing concrete.

A lot of the temple stuff reminds me of the story of the monkeys and bananas. You know, the “study” that never happened, but teaches a lesson anyway.

Monkeys start adopting behavior because they KNOW the consequences. They pass on the behavior without explanation and future generations keep the behavior going without knowing why. “Because it has always been done.” or “It must be important or we wouldn’t have to do it.”

That’s kind of the mentality that I think we are in.

[QuestionAbound]

Old Timer wrote:

my mother was a secretary in Pres. McKay’s office before she got married; etc. My mom’s experiences particularly are fascinating).

Have you shared any of her experiences here in Stay LDS?

I’d love to read about some of them.

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