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For me it was simply a point of critical mass. I was doing everything right, trying hard, HP at young age, bishopric, HC, and I was feeling horrible all the time with all my church related work. I didn’t know why I felt terrible, exhausted, burnt out and feeble. I was paying my tithing, going to the temple, supporting the missionary effort, guiding the flock. But my brain could no longer compartmentalise reality from the gospel, and it just did a big Blue Screen of Death reset one weekend. I decided to get to the bottom of all the mysteries, and after a 2 year mission doing so, my mind was clear, and so was my soul. What was left however, was a mormon in name only. All the assumed guilt and perceived shortcomings of being a natural man trying hopelessly to achieve church perfection and endure to the end, was simply gone.
Mid 1800’s Temple Recommend Questions. Have you committed murder by shedding innocent blood, or consenting thereto?
Have you betrayed your brethren or sisters in anything?
Have you committed adultery, by having any connection with a woman that was not your wife, or a man that was not your husband?
Have you taken and made use of property not your own, without the consent of the owner?
Have you cut hay where you had no right to, or turned your animals into another person’s grain or field, without his knowledge and consent?
Have you lied about or maliciously misrepresented any person or thing?
Have you borrowed anything that you have not returned, or paid for?
Have you borne false witness against your neighbor?
Have you taken the name of Deity in vain?
Have you coveted anything not your own?
Have you been intoxicated with strong drink?
Have you found lost property and not returned it to the owner, or used all diligence to do so?
Have you branded an animal that you did not know to be your own?
Have you taken another’s horse or mule from the range and rode it, without the owner’s consent?
Have you fulfilled your promises in paying your debts, or run into debt without prospect of paying?
Have you taken water to irrigate with, when it belonged to another person at the time you used it?
Do you pay your tithing promptly?
Do you teach your family the gospel of salvation?
Do you speak against your brethren, or against any principle taught in the Bible, Book of Mormon, book of Doctrine and Covenants, revelations given to Joseph Smith the Prophet and the Presidency of the Church as now organized?
Do you pray in your family night and morning and attend to secret prayer?
Do you wash your body and have your family do so, as often as health and cleanliness require and circumstances will permit?
Do you labor six days and rest, or go to the house of worship, on the seventh?
Do you preside over your household as a servant of God, and is your family subject to you?
Have you labored diligently and earned faithfully the wages paid you by your employers?
Do you oppress the hireling in his wages?
Have you taken up and converted any stray animal to your own use, or in any manner appropriated one to your benefit, without accounting therefore to the proper authorities?
We the willing lead by the unknowing
are doing the impossible
for the ungrateful.
We have done so much
for so long
with so little
we are now qualified to to anything
with nothing.
I second the leadership roulette. I offered my recommend to the bishop but he wouldn’t take it. It’s been expired since that and i have no desire to bother with any sort of renewal.
Quote:“Communing with God is communing with our own hearts, our own best selves, not with something foreign and accidental. Saints and devotees have gone into the wilderness to find God; of course they took God with them, and the silence and detachment enabled them to hear the still, small voice of their own souls, as one hears the ticking of his own watch in the stillness of the night.”
― John Burroughs
Throughout my church career I was I instructed that covenants are an arrangement before two individuals, and are a two way street. The most common example given was that the slightest impure thought would invalidate priesthood authority or offend the spirit, as you are not keeping up your end of the bargain. Much of the temple ritual is to make covenants between the member and the church. When the church does not keep up it’s end of the bargain by being true and faithful to its members, the covenant is no longer in force. If the church is not what it claims to be, then it is no longer entitled to the resolute and unyielding devotion of the member due to not meeting the conditions upon which that blessing was predicated.
Age 27 reactivated. -WML
New Ward
-WML
-EQ 1st C
-EQP
Ward Boundry Change, New Bishop
-Ward Clerk Finances
-Side Calling Stake Auditor
-Bishopric 1st C
-High Council (burnout in full swing)
Ward Bishopric Change
-HPGL (Faith crisis initiated trying to understand burnout)
Move to new Ward (2011)
-HPG 2nd C
-Faith crisis in full swing
-Scoutmaster
-Out to wife
-Cub Leader and Primary Teacher
-Faith crisis over, now transition
-Out to Bishop
37 years old, released as primary teacher, retained as Cub Leader.
I just had my third meeting with my very nice Bishop. He wanted to see where I’m at, but after explaining my worldview he says there is nothing he can fix, but is wondering what callings I might be willing to take on after the scouting year is over. I didn’t answer anything specific, and reiterated the need to be authentic. He seemed to understand.
I honestly don’t feel I have anything to contribute spiritually, as I am on a different wavelength than the regular members would appreciate.
But I am ok with it.
The word of wisdom (not by commandment or constraint) actually supports the wise consumption of mild barley drinks (fermented) but speaks against strong drinks (distilled). But it is a modern day test of obedience to a prohibition-era interpretation of the scripture. Sometimes it is like religion is the antidote to the atonement. Through love, the intention of the atonement is to unite what was divided. Religions seem intent on dividing through certainty. I would suggest that there is a vast expanse between enlisted members (stake level and below) and officers (70’s and up) in terms of authority. No one of the enlisted men, no matter how long they have served, will ever outrank a GA. Other than controlling the affairs of their own stakes/wards and managing the pittance of budget, no enlisted man can apply for promotion, or have any influence on church policy or procedure. If a certain enlisted man is very charismatic and valiant, no amount of support or petition from his ward/stake members will grant him special favor with the officers. He cannot be voted in or run for office. The only way to bridge that gap is to have his name advanced by the officers, and it seems they prefer to keep their circle of power from being contaminated by, oh let’s say a simple fisherman or a carpenter.
In summary, the lay clergy and general members of the chrch have priesthood authority to do intangible things when exercising the power of God. They can bless the sacrament, but how do you know anything actually happened to it? They can bless a person who is sick, and they might or might not get better. They have authority in the social fiction of the church.
However if a GA was to bless the sacrament, members would feel strongly that it is somehow more blessed or more sacred, than when brother Jake did it, because the real authority is in the
ideaof the social fiction, regardless of it being the same prayer and same priesthood authority. The worst part of this, is when the person in authority feels every crazy idea is inspired by God, and there is no filter anymore to give balance and prevent abuse. I’ve taken part in 6 stake level hearings, and pulled the shortest lot twice and had to defend the accused. In most of the cases the verdict had really been decided before the proceedings, one of which was in absentia. The other outcome was greatly influenced to the side of leniency due to the status of the accused’s family.
