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Seeing satan is a pretty scary thing but I recently saw jesus too. I surround my bedroom with pictures of the savior. At the foot of my bed on the wall there is a favorite of mine. Was a few days ago. I was looking at it. The normal yellow background turned blue and was giving off light. The picture became a doorway to wherever the lord is at. I saw clouds behind him that were moving. His hair was blowing in the wind. I could see him breathing. The picture turned into a TV screen except real like a window. I believe the lord was really there looking at me! I saw his real face. As I was watching him his left hand started glowing orange and giving off light! The center of the light was the hole in his hand. I think he was just telling me that he is watching over us. This incredible visitation lasted a good 45 seconds. Then it started fading away untill only the flat picture remained. He was gone from my room. I see white lights on his pictures sometimes, pretty often actually, but never this. I think seeing his face brought on the visitation by satan. Been days, I wasnt sure if I was coming back here anymore. I have alittle more info about things and had a couple more supernatural experiences. Had one yesterday afternoon that scared me pretty bad, I’ve told my family but not my mother for fear she would panic. I do take medication but it has never stopped everything I see, some does get through. I was sleeping yesterday about 2pm. In my dream I was sitting on my bed thinking about something. I felt funny, looked behind me, on the top of our food storage a mans head popped up! Soon as I knew who it was he smiled a wicked smile before going back down behind the cans. It was satan himself! I saw every detail of his face, eye color, face wrinkles, shape of his nose, he had an arrogance about him I wanted to punch him in the face! I took a swing at him but he slipped back down behind the cans. I then woke up with a cold shiver going up my spine, followed by anger at the entire thing. He didnt appear as a monster just a man. If I were an artist I could paint his picture. Usually in my dreams I never see peoples faces very clear or at all. This was the only time in my 41 years to see a face clear as if he was right there in the room with me. It scared me pretty bad. I’m still shaken by the experience. Such arrogance! In order to goto the temple my church said I need to attend church every Sunday for a year. It’s too hard, pretty much impossible. I’m not a crowd person. Going where there are tons of people gathered, is like information overload to my senses. I get extreme anxiety and need to leave for air. I often wonder what I might see inside a temple though? Being the way I am. I’ve seen pictures of temples and there is a faint dome of light surrounding these buildings! I can only speculate that this is the veil being lifted. The temple in my town had a renovation last year, they opened the temple to the public for about 2 weeks. I jumped on that offer and finally got to see inside. It felt way different than outside. I felt a powerfull presence inside the temple but I couldn’t see them. I walked through with my brother. Afterwards I asked him if he could feel it? He said feel what? I said I could feel hundreds of eyes watching us I just couldn’t see them they were being hidden from me or just outside of my range. I want to go back after the dedication but I cant get in. So I am sort of stuck. I cant advance and I’m not quitting. The crowd issue is one of my biggest weaknesses. I dont know how to fix it or get past it. I chose this site because it was the first lds forum I could find after a 4 hour search online. The lds forum I need doesnt exist. I would have to create it myself and deal with all the phoney baloney fakers out there that just want to poke fun or discredit the church of jesus christ of latter day saints. So much evil and wickedness online! If I’m offending I’ll quietly goto another lds site. I’m not going to twist anybody’s arm to believe my accounts. You can believe it and take comfort from the good experiences I’m sharing or say it’s all lies and not believe it. I try to always tell the truth. My Hope is another like me will comment, swap experiences, teach me alittle more about what I already have learned. I’m looking for more knowledge about a hidden world. I dont know what God will allow me to see or what I’m allowed to talk about, none of them have said i cant talk about it. Each experience leaves me with more questions. All I can do is pray and continue to search the internet for any clues. I’m being allowed to see stuff normal people wont get to untill they die. I’m not doing this to write a book or sell anything to make money. I’m being shown parts of the spirit world, I dont know why or what its building up to. Is it getting me ready to meet a in person visitation of an angel or higher level? I dont have very many answers to give, why I’m searching. I’m not doing this for attention. I dont want praise. I’m just talking about the fantastic stuff that’s been happening to me since 2011. I’m not putting on a show. I dont think I’m a prophet or have special powers. Unless you call having schizophrenia a special power, lol. It is looked on as a delusional, hallucinogenic, disability in western society. But having it for years myself, I dont think that’s correct. What it is is having a thinner veil around us. Mine reaches about 20 feet away, I havent really measured it. From reading alot of personal accounts online I believe I’m right. Why western science will never figure us out. A good chunk of scientists and doctors are atheists. They will never believe anything I say, instead they throw pills at us. I think it’s out of fear. I have tried talking to doctors about the things I see and my experiences. All they do is follow procedure and change or adjust my medication. It isnt the problem though. I get angry when they call it a hallucination. It’s not. They are as real as you are. The medication isnt like taking an aspirin. It hurts me, it gives me brain damage pretty much. I become dependent on it. The side effects are horrible! At any time the meds can quit working, it’s a constant fear I have. Long term medication use is fatal. Living without the pills is too hard, I need some to quiet the voices and sounds. At the same time its killing me. I just want to share my experiences with the time I’ve got left. I like reading about near death experiences and stories hospice nurses tell. Not because I’m fascinated with death, I want to learn about God and as much spiritual stuff as I can while here. Not to tell everybody, i find it fascinating. I want to learn as much as I’m allowed to see before I leave. My angel visitations are real, never had them before this year. You can pray for an angel to be sent to you, sometimes they show up. Do not treat is as entertainment when it happens. You can ask them questions you have, you might get answers you dont expect. It will absolutely happen! I’ve had a number of personal experiences with angels and demons, if these things are real then the bible and book of mormon are also completely true also. I spend most of my time reading and watching the news of the world. Events of the earth are syncing with the bible perfectly. These events are increasing in frequency and intensity every day, building up to a major collapse of civilization. It’s coming whether we are ready or not. It could happen today, we are that close. World war is super close to breaking out in multiple places at once. Soon as it does millions of people will die. The few of us that survive get to deal with the collapse of society, wont that be fun! We are hoping the lord hides us from evil most of the time so we wont have to defend ourselves from looters and attackers. My symptoms became much bigger after this traumatic incident that happened the day after Christmas 2011. I’m not going to go into it but I had a nervous breakdown of sorts. I broke my own mind through rigorous exercise and punishment. I was under such pressure my mind failed me. After a 3 month stay in a mental hospital I felt alot better and was able to go home. I used to struggle with my new abilities, fight the medication. But it always ended with me going back to the hospital. My abilities really developed in the last 7 years. When my mind went I cracked or broke the veil around me. I started seeing alot of spirits! But most of them were evil. I used to wake up with scratches on my body, I didnt do it, they were assaults by demons. I was being haunted by multiple evil spirits in my house. I used to wake up at night hearing footsteps on the ceiling, coming down the hall and stopping outside my bedroom. This went on for about a year. We blessed the house a couple times, I got blessed several times, it didnt stop it for very long though. It got so bad I started sleeping outside for peace. Then I started putting up pictures of the savior around my bedroom, activity stopped instantly! Then I started only seeing angels and good spirits. It’s like night and day from what I used to have to live through. My sister says my soul glows brighter and it attracts all kinds of souls from the spirit world. I’m like a spirit magnet. I have to take the medication to quiet the voices, otherwise I couldn’t hear anybody in the real world talking, yes it’s that noisy. Imagine being in the center of a crowd of people talking. I hear bits of conversations, insults, praise, threats, advice, anything. I think it’s why alot of schizophrenics become violent, they take it out on the closest person. They make all the rest of us good people look bad. Why there is this stigma about all schizophrenics. Not all of us are violent or bad. I’ve never been arrested or even have a criminal record. You can live with it, takes practice and knowledge as to what it is and why. I chose to take this body. The lord wouldnt have let me have it if he didnt think I could handle it. Cool, lots of responses! I’ve tried support groups. All those people are only interested in the next drug they hope will take away their gifts. I thought about telling them what’s going on but none of them want to hear it. They want to be cured. I do not. I’ve heard from facebook groups that there are a tiny percent of schizophrenics that think the way I do. Might be able to answer some of my questions. Mostly I just want to swap stories of our experiences, learn alittle more. I’ve tried shrinks, they dont work. Mostly educated overly obsessed with themselves, want to lord over the weaker minded of us that they have degrees and you don’t. All obsessed with themselves. Oftentimes they do more harm to you than good, and charge you for it. Seeing Angels last night, same as every night, but this night was different. Right before I woke up I had this very vivid dream of an angel and a demon fighting. It was like I was standing right there watching it. The angel had the demon pinned. Then I got a very strong feeling of coming civil war. I then woke up with this message I needed to tell others. I’m schizophrenic in case you were trying to figure me out. My veil is thinner than regular people. I am always surrounded by spirits and angels, we all are. I cant see yours unless they want me to. Its comforting knowing we are never alone. Off medication they talk to me sometimes but so do demons, evil spirits, fallen angels, whatever you want to call them. As long as I stay righteous as possible the things I see are pleasant even helpfull. Angel’s bring me messages and warn me of things. Even talk to me. I like to think of it as a gift, it’s not a bad thing. I chose the name screwloose because it makes me laugh, it’s a personal joke. I have been searching for years for another like me that has accepted what they are and might care to share their experiences with me. Each time I get visitations I learn alittle bit more about the spirit world I’m allowed to see. Not everything is being revealed at once, little bits at a time. It overlaps the physical world. Angels and spirits can appear exactly like anybody. Finding out if they are is trickier. Usually they are here to help us out. I usually have somebody with me to confirm how many people they are looking at, I sometimes see an extra person that isnt there, lol! This is the only true church. I’m a very spiritual person. As long as I stay as righteous as possible I’m shielded from evil quite a bit. It still gets through sometimes, torments me for a night. I do battle with the adversary pretty often. He will never break me because I know the truth. Or as much truth as we are allowed to know as mortals. I dont know all the secrets of the universe but I will eventually.
